today's not-wednesday

today, on this previously glorious but now overcast, not-wednesday i find my mind is preoccupied with 'many' different things...

and like a kettle that has boiled, i shall pour it out thus...

1 - really shouldn't have made reference to kettles or coffee without actually having a cup of coffee in my immediate vicinity... [school-boy error right about there...]

2 - cut aubergines (or possibly courgettes) appear to smell a bit like cat-sh!t... i woke up this morning convinced that dave (still not my cat) had left me a lil' parcel on the doormat as he is wont to do... (really should stop just tossing it out of the 'communal' window)... i even opened the door expecting to be greeted by a huge laws-of-physics-defying steam-y heap-y... but it was not there.

i threw the aubergines (and courgettes) into the bin and now the smell seems to be localised around there... i have in effect made a scientific, and also highly marketable, discovery...

thus...

"do you need portable cat stink, but can't be dealing with carrying around cat droppings just on the off-chance?! well we here at bwoi industries have a solution... Porta-Stank, a vacuum sealed pouch giving you the ultimate in bad-cat-tray badness at your convenience..."

[yeah, dragon's den here we come...]

3 - the alarm that goes off every time there's a hint of thunder is going off again... [still not as good for dancing too as a washing machine, but putting a break-beat behind it was amusing for a while...]

4 - i still don't have a brew... [and the kettle still isn't boiling]

5 - squeeze's 'pulling mussels from a shell' appears to be stuck on repeat in my head... which i guess is just one of those things... top tune though, got a one note guitar solo in it too...

happy not-wednesday y'all 8) [happy not-wednesday y'all]

i'm off to go and address the not-brew issue... [damn right]

caffeine maple bacon (in no particular order)

i love bacon...

i love maple (the syrup, the word and the tree...)

let's face it, ya can't beat a thick-sliced maple-cured bacon sandwich... its almost as if the humble pig should have been born with maple syrup for blood (like the aliens in that film, i forget what its called :P ...but a darn site more useful)

and my relationship with caffeine is a well documented one... you gotta love the coffee, and there's always the relentless... (caffeine-based life-form? moi? yeah quite probably...)

obviously, a traditional way to combine these three favourites of mine would be one of 'those' sandwiches washed down with a lovely (orange) mug of peruvian coffee... that's a perfect breakfast/lunch/dinner/brunch/snack/munch right about there...

but not really that portable... exacerbated by the fact that the bacon sandwich purchased whilst out and about is generally an item of extremely variable quality (with a definite trend towards the low), and generally nowhere near as lovely as the one i envisage when i think of maple bacon (although special mention must be made... the sandwiches i used to get everyday from the van on the trading estate in wednesbury, sausage bacon and chilli sauce on a french stick, were sandwiches par excellence...)

but now some quite-blatant genii came up with not only the (obvious) idea of combining all three of these magic foodstuffs together, but also making it super-portable...

ladies and gentlemen i present...

the caffeinated maple bacon lollipop

hell yes... 8)

that''s some goodness right about there... and apparently, its made with bacon salt, which means that its not only kosher, but also vegetarian friendly!! this may or may not be worrying...

i do find the insistence on marketing the lollipop on pieces of american stylee bacon a bit worrying though... i'd much prefer it on a thick-cut freshly sizzled rasher of maple-cured... nice

but i did the maff... and there's more caffeine in two of these bad boy's than there is in a can of relentless, meaning they have to win some kind of prize for portable caffeine-ness-ness (or something)

the site i found them on won't ship outside the US, but like the ostrich burger... i feel it will only be a small amount of time before i get my hands on these yummy caffeine-y morsels... (and i'm fairly sure when i do, there won't be enough)

but then i did find this...

zombie jerky 

(its teriyaki flavoured too!!)

once more... hell yes

fed up of watching your brethren get munched by the seemingly endless zombie hordes? bite back without gettin' bitten back... that's right, you can now do you part without ever leaving the safety of our heavilly fortified and geographically protected base at ***censored (cos some information you just can't share)***... by munching on some zombie jerky...

right on!!

got to be honest, never been much of a jerky fan... but i'd be willing to give this one a swing...

not sure about the green though?!