the day before the election (contemporary like a time capsule)

transcript of improvised election song recorded the day before the election last year...lyrics were improvised from very loose general knowledege of how the election campaign had been proceeding, and newspaper headlines from that days editions of both the metro and the sun (admitedly stretching the definition of newspaper a lil' bit there)...

the one time i did political, and it still got run through the fatbwoi filter - right on 8) 

***warning... does contain several rude words, including repeated instances of  'that thing what we do in the riggin''***     __________________________________________________

the day before the election (in headlines)

don't leave us hangin' here just standin' here like 3 idiots in suits oh yeah
you know don't leave us hangin' nick clegg what do you think your going to do?
don't go and meet the audience, stand her with david cameron...
let's laugh at a-gordon brown
as he goes to shake the hand and he doesn't understand
why his personality it is not going down
cos nobody likes you gordon - cos you've got a face like an arse
nobody likes you david - because lets face it you're just too f***ing upper class
and the own-goals and sneaky tactics they're adding up
did a lie about the dodgy dealings?
yeah but no but yeah but no but yeah but not but yeah but no but...
do you like my vicky pollard top
i wanna be mr david cameron look at my nice audi car
or it might be something from the eighties like a lan-ci-a
this is gordon brown we are the party with the serious policies
you are not electing a tv personality
don't do what we tell you... three leaders. david cameron what does he say?
lets ask him - he said nothing's getting done with labour
and a vote for us gives britain the break that it deserves
what what what what what... what what what
and nick cleggs says that people are sick to the back teeth
of the blue team and the red team
they're taking turns what about the yellow team?
well nick clegg we would elect you
if you had yourself a better leader like that paddy ashdown bloke
cos at least he got caught with his pants down...
do you see what we did there? oh yeah!
and the labour candidate stands by the worst pm comment
and phillipa stroud stands by the you can cure gays comment
but if you got cured by her then you could stay in
the bed and breakfast that belongs to the other one
the vote it is going to the wire
gordon brown said something about sarah but it went away
what did it say?
what do we stand for? here is a lot of words in a sheet 
that you're not gonna read from very far away
our at a glance guide to the parties - you what?
let's blast CO2 emissions? i think we're wandering off topic here
bring paxman back we need some jerry
oh jerry foss not jerry paxman, bring me jerry foss not jerry paxman
hmmmm hooo huuuh oooow ye-ahhh hooo
ah aaaaaaaaah-aaah-aaah-aaaaaaaaaah
carlos tevez has got manky hair
ah aaaaaaaaah-aaah-ooooooow

i can't see
sarah's been there all the way... i just love her
sarah tell me that you're going to stay - even when i'm on the dole
sarah now i'm, sad - i've got emotions

something rhymes with sad? bad?

and a rhyme with emotion? brad? rad? rad yeah

that's ice-cold baby, rad, slick, smooth as f***
          __________________________________________________ 

of course, it did wander-off a bit in the middle, but i reckon i'd got it back on course by the downbeat emo outro... as you do

happy time